Today, Ms. Marina (name changed for security reasons) came to her last meeting with a psychologist from our Stabilization Support Services Charitable Foundation. For almost two months, she regularly attended individual sessions with a specialist. She worked hard on herself to learn how to overcome stress and anxiety, to control and listen to herself, to understand her inner desires, and finally to try to enjoy life, no matter how difficult it may be in today’s reality.
“They say miracles don’t happen, but no, they do, I tell you. During these months of working with your Foundation’s psychologist, I have become a different person. I can’t even believe I’ve done it. I finally started to fight stress, or at least I understood what exactly I needed to do. I learned not only to get upset, but also to act in difficult situations. I found common ground with my daughter and simply “let go” of the past. My words sound like a fairy tale, but thanks to your help, it became a reality for me. The depression I had been in for more than a year finally began to recede. Of course, there is still a lot of work ahead, but I believe that now I will succeed,” — the woman shares hopefully.
A woman’s story
Marina is a native of Kherson. She was born and has lived her entire life in this picturesque and powerful city on the banks of the Dnieper River. She did not leave her homeland even during the full-scale invasion and occupation of the city, because she cannot imagine her life anywhere else. Three years ago, she underwent a very difficult operation and defeated cancer. Her parents and daughter were always by her side, supporting her. However, constant stress, anxiety, loss, fear for her life, and the unstable situation in the city due to endless shelling had a strong impact on the woman’s psychosocial state.
“It was very difficult for me, morally difficult. I understood that I had to do something about it, but I couldn’t do anything on my own. My depression grew stronger every day. I was constantly in a bad mood, I was exhausted, I didn’t want to do anything, it seemed like there was no point anymore. I attended group therapy sessions several times, but I didn’t like them. When you’re sitting with strangers, it’s hard to admit the problems and experiences that are bothering you. Sometimes it’s even hard to admit things to yourself, let alone to strangers. Then, almost by accident, I came to a meeting of your Charitable Foundation’s mobile team. I had a few questions for a lawyer and needed legal assistance. There I met a psychologist, Ms. Inna. She told me that this project offers the opportunity to work individually with a psychologist. I was interested and decided to give it a try,” — recalls Ms. Marina.
Working with the Charity Fund’s psychologist
Over the next two months, Marina attended weekly individual sessions with the Fund’s psychologist. Each meeting lasted 1.5 hours and was held in a closed format. During these sessions, the woman learned about stress management strategies, discovered interesting methods for stabilizing her emotional state, discovered social support skills, and, most importantly, learned how to apply her new knowledge in her life.
According to Inna Moroz, a psychologist with the mobile team in the Kherson region, at the beginning of the sessions, Marina was depressed, found it difficult to share her problems, and was very withdrawn. However, after just a few meetings, the situation changed significantly.
“My main goal was to help Marina master stress management skills. The first thing we did was to master “breathing techniques.” That is, we learned how to calm growing stress through proper breathing. She had to do these exercises at home at least three times a day. Next, we tried to deal with specific problems. First, we identified them, then we brainstormed ideas for solving these problems, and only then did we draw up an action plan and set a time frame for it. In addition, we brought physical activity back into her life and began a kind of social cleansing. And these are just a few of the strategies we used to restore the woman’s psycho-emotional state,” —– the psychologist shares.
After each session, Marina had homework assignments that she completed over the following week. In this way, all the knowledge she gained during the meetings was put into practice.
“Every meeting with the psychologist was special for me. We didn’t just talk, we worked, and we worked very productively. I used many different techniques and tried to look inside myself to understand the very reason why I was in such a state. I admit that I cried at almost every meeting, as if I was releasing the pain that had been inside me for years. After the meetings, I always felt as if I had grown wings and wanted to move forward,”— says Marina.
In addition to stabilizing her own well-being and psycho-emotional state, after working with a psychologist, Marina’s relationship with her daughter improved.
“I have an 11-year-old daughter who is now entering adolescence. This is a very difficult time for me. We live together, and lately there have been many misunderstandings. I really wanted her to hear me, but at the same time I was afraid of hurting her, I didn’t know how to behave so as not to make things worse. The psychologist also helped me with this, and I am very grateful for that,” — says the woman.
The result of the work
According to Marina, she feels much better now. Working with a psychologist has restored her self-confidence and desire to move forward.
“I found myself and realized that it is possible to be myself. It may sound a little cliché and everyone talks about it, but try to just be yourself, don’t pretend and don’t play the role of someone else. I stopped closing myself off, paying attention to other people, and left the past in the past. Many new things appeared. I finally started doing everything that I had put off, thanks to the “Start and Continue” strategy. Therefore, I am very grateful to your Foundation for your help. You helped me become myself again,” — emphasizes Ms. Marina.
Psychosocial assistance for residents of Mykolaiv, Zaporizhzhia, and Kherson regions is provided as part of the implementation of project “Lifesaving response to protection concerns and humanitarian needs of conflict affected people in the South and South-East of Ukraine” is implemented by the Stabilization Support Services Charitable Foundation in partnership with the international humanitarian organization CARE, with financial support from the Danish Ministry of Foreign Affairs.